Zumba

I started taking Zumba at the Y last year sometime. I really enjoyed the instructor but wasnt totally into it. That's what i do, I start something with intentions on following through. Zumba, ab class, cardio kickboxing, cycling. Anyway, I stopped Zumba for a while but went back to the Y a few months ago to try again. It was a different instructor and I hated it. I later found out the instructor I liked was teaching in my town at an arts building. I now go every day possible, I'm hooked! She's so much fun and its such a crazy workout. I'm not sure the purpose of writing this, I'm just pretty excited to have found something active that I love doing.

Another year over...

With the new year quickly approaching I got thinking about things I did and didn't accomplish this year. I think I have reason to feel satisfied, my biggest goal was to leave the Y and find a better job and I definitely accomplished that thankfully. I got a new car, made some new friends and started putting my foot down/sticking up for myself more. Those are all good, but I'd like to accomplish more. The following list is not resolutions - these are things that WILL be done within the next year.

Im going to lose weight. First goal is 30 lbs, then another 30 after that.

I will become a runner. I want to run races and feel like I've accomplished something. Crossing that finish line will feel amazing.

Im going to put myself out there more and hopefully start dating. It's been a long time, I'm almost 30 and I really would like to get married. The only thing I seem to be able to do is become friends with guys, which is fine but I'd like to find someone to have a connection with, I miss that feeling.

I will become more independent. I'm already doing pretty well with this but I'd like to continue.

Those are the big ones this year, what are some of yours? Good luck!

Day one..

Today I ran outside for the first time. I usually run on a treadmill (not nearly as often as I should), but i decided it was time to hit the streets...literally. The goal is to run the broad street run the first weekend in May, which is 10 miles. I'll be the first person to tell you that i have a loooonnnngggg way to go to be able to do that, but today was a start. My time was no wear near spetacular (in fact my running app classified my time as "poor") but I did it. With this goal and a little encouragement (and even some friendly ridicule hah) from friends, I think ill be able to pull this off...and i can't wait to be able to say that I did it!

Mobile...

I've been gone a longgggg time from Blogger! There's actually a lot I could blog about but right now I'm just testing to see if this mobile app works. If it does then i can see myself posting a lot more often! :-)

disgust!

I used to look like this:

skinny right?  i had curves, but i was an ok size.  i always was about 135 lbs.  thought i was fat then, gotta love teenage/young adult sense of self

today I look like this:

what  a change right?  good grief!!!  if this isn't motivation I don't know what is!  i WILL lose this stomach/arms/legs/chin i've gained over the past few years.  i know it's hard but I will ... I have to.  if i'm not happy in my own skin than what do I have?  

random lyrics...

is feeling these today.  not sad, just feeling them

"where are you? and i'm so sorry.  i cannot sleep, i cannot dream tonight....miss you, miss you..."

random quote of the day ...3/14

"No matter how many plans we make or steps we follow, we never know how our day is going to end up. We’d prefer to know, of course, what curve balls will be thrown our way. It’s the accidents that always turn out to be the most interesting parts of our day, the people we never expected to show up, a turn of events we never would have chose for ourselves. All of a sudden you find yourself somewhere you never expected to be and its nice, or it takes some getting used to. Still, maybe you’ll find yourself appreciating it somewhere down the line. So you go to sleep each night thinking about tomorrow, going over your plans, preparing for them, and hoping that whatever accidents come your way will be happy ones" - Grey's Anatomy

caffeine withdrawal

So, I may not be the best practicing Catholic there is, but I at least try to give lent a shot.  This year I decided I'm really going to stick to it, and so far so good.  Starting this past Wednesday I gave up soda/caffeine.  Now, anyone who knows me knows that I'm rarely seen without a Diet Coke within 5 feet of me somewhere.  I'm hooked/obsessed/in love with it haha.

I was anticipating some withdrawal from the caffeine, and boy was I right.  Around 4:00 on Wednesday I got the worst headache ever.  I also was in the worst mood ever haha.  I also find that I'm extremely tired by 7 pm.  Wednesday night I was asleep by 7:45!  Thursday I was asleep by 9:15, and last night (Friday) I barely made it until 11!  I guess the amount of caffeine I was drinking was what was keeping me up until all hours of the night.  At least that problem is solved.  Today's Saturday and I actually feel pretty good.  My body isn't beating me up for not drinking it anymore.  No more headaches or bad moods.  Definitely still tired though! haha.

Now my problem is...what do I drink?  Obviously water is the healthy choice, but I'm not a huge fan of water.  That probably sounds weird right?  Yeah I thought so.  I can drink it, but it's not my favorite, I need flavor.  I found that most of the juice in this house has a ton of sugar in it (which I don't want, I'm trying to be healthy) and the crystal light my mom has, has caffeine in it.  I looked it up and they make a decaf version so I may have to invest in that.

What do you guys drink?  Any suggestions?

abc's...

I'm following Jennifer's lead today and doing this little abc survey ... why not right?

A - Age: 28 .... ugh.

B - Bed Size:  full ... so not big enough when the 5 year old decides to climb in!

C - Chore You Hate:  cleaning the bathroom.  especially the shower/tub.  can't stand doing that.

D - Dog:  no dog for me :(

E - Essential to start your day:  Diet coke!!!   BUT, I agreed to give it up for lent because this older lady that I love asked me to.  So, I'm going to be a miserable person starting on Wednesday.  Wish me luck!

F - Favorite Colors:  shades of yellow and orange

G - Gold or Silver:  i definitely prefer silver.  or white gold :)

H - Height: I stand at a whopping 5'1

I - Instruments you play:  I played the clarinet yearssssss ago.  i still remember a few things, but not enough to play anything anyone would enjoy listen to!

J - Job Title:  assistant group supervisor.  fancy talk for assistant teacher at a daycare, ha

K - Kids:  I have one, Saige, who's 5.  I recently decided (as recent as this past weekend) that I do not want anymore.

L - Live:   I live in Phoenixville, PA. The home of the Blob! hah

M - Mom's Name:  random question.  Mom's name is Michele

N - Nickname:  Ange, or Mom :)

O - Overnight Hospital Stay: oh gosh, more than a few times.  I stayed overnight when I had Saige, of course.  Also when I was younger I would get bad cysts so I would have to stay in the hospital for a few days at a time on liquid diets.  Never any fun.  I much prefer being home.

P - Pet Peeves:  when people tell me to call/text them and don't answer/respond, bad drivers, getting stuck at work late, bad tv, leaving heat up time left on the microwave instead of clearing it so you can see the clock ... this list could go on forever.

Q - Quote from a movie:    i like too many to choose just one here

R - Righty/Lefty:  I'm a righty

S - Sibling: this is a sad question for me. I have a sister who is 7 years younger than me.  I also have a brother who is 4 years younger than me, but he's no longer with us.  He passed away 3 years ago.  Can't believe it's been that long already.

T - Time you wake up:  5:45 for work ... usually by 7ish on the weekends because Saige still wakes up early.

U - Underwear:  whatever I grab out of the drawer haha.  usually bikini briefs or something.

V - Veggies you dislike:  I'm totally not a vegetable person.  I'll eat my fair share of things, but I HATE peas, and any kind of bean that isn't a green bean.  I also do not enjoy brussel sprouts ...yuck.

W - What makes you late: I really hate being late.  That said, I find myself running late more often than I'd like.  I have to be at work by 7, but I usually get in there about 7:06 haha.  What makes me late is getting Saige up and moving.  Sometimes that kid just won't budge!  Other times it's really not her fault, but it's me trying to remember all of the stuff she needs for the day.

X - X-rays you've had:  this is another one that could take all day.  Knee/leg (about 100 times), teeth, head, chest, ankle, foot.  Most of them multiple times ha.  

Y - Yummy food you make:  I like to think that I can cook and bake pretty well.  I make a mean baked ziti, strawberry shortcake, cookies, and lots of other things. :)

Z - Zoo animal:    Hmmm, I enjoy watching the penguins frolic around.  I do love the polar bears a lot though even though whenever I'm at the zoo they're sleeping haha.  

Well, that was a fun way to kill some time! :)

giveaway winner

Well my first blogger giveaway has ended!  I used Random.org to generate a random winner from the comments I recieved and the winner is ..... Liz!

congrats!  I'll be sending you an email with the details!  congrats!!

I look forward to hosting more of these in the future, this was fun!


while i'm still on here, I have another link for you guys.  Have you heard about Joss & Main? It's an exclusive private sale site that CSN Stores recently launched. It offers exclusive sales on top brands and designers for the home at up to 70% off retail. Sales only last 72 hours, but new ones are launched daily.  It's a pretty cool site that's feeding my newfound internet shopping addiction lately haha.  anyway, here's a link for you guys to shop with.  when you use it you earn me credits so shop away! :)  no really though, it's a cool site even if you don't use that link, check it out.  enjoy!  http://www.jossandmain.com/

hello there...

I figured it was time to do an actual post, it's been a while, but what else is new right?  I haven't been up to much really, just the usuals (work and saige).  This past weekend was fun though.  It started out interesting, but worked out haha.  I was supposed to go out for two friend's birthdays with hinkle for dinner saturday night.  My dad was going to watch saige for me until my mom got home from work.  Saige ended up not feeling well and I didn't want to stick my dad watching a sick kid, so I didn't go to dinner.  Later on that night a bunch of us were supposed to go to rock n bowl (bowling from 11-2 am).  I called to reserve lanes and the guy told me they had changed their hours and weren't doing that anymore.  Awesome.  We decided to drive a few towns over to another bowling alley that does 12-2 am bowling.  Trish called and reserved two lanes for the 8 of us.  She had to pay ahead of time to reserve the lanes so she shelled out over 100 dollars on her card (we were paying her when we got there).   We get there around 11:30 and there's a line out the door.  We stand in line until about 12:20 when we finally get to the register.  What do we find out?  The jerks had charged her card and not written down her name for any lanes and they were all booked.  All of that waiting and we didn't even get to bowl!  After Hinkle ripped the guy a new one for a good 15 minutes Trish got her money refunded and we left.  We got back to town and went to the local dive bar (lol) to pick up beer and went back to Hinkle's to hang out.  Some of them played card drinking games, but I just hung with Trish and watched.  My night/morning didn't end until I went home around 4:30 am ...only for saige to be up by 7 haha.  it was a rough one, but good times were had.  It's always nice to see everyone, especially those I don't see often enough.

As for the rest of the week so far, it's the same as always.  It's only Tuesday so I haven't really done much but work.  I started eating better and working out (again) on Monday so we'll see how it goes this time.  I really need to stick with it, summer is approaching way too fast for my liking!  How are all of your weeks going so far?

OH, I can't believe I haven't posted this here yet.  If you're one of my facebook friends you've undoubtedly seen this link 50 times by now haha.  I'm doing a walk for Organ donation awareness in April.  I've already reached my donation goal thanks to some very generous people, but I want to continue raising as much money as I can.  This cause is important to me because one of my close friends has been waiting for a heart for 6 months.  I can't do a whole lot to help him specifically, so this is what I'm doing instead.  Did you know that 1 organ donor can save up to 50 people?  That's fantastic.  Organ donation is something I encourage everyone to do.  Anyway, here's the link to my donation page DASH for Organ Donation Awareness, every little bit helps so please consider donating if you can!  Thanks!

Also, if you haven't already, don't forget to enter my giveaway in my entry here, it's pretty fantastic!

Alright well, I'm off to read.  I'm in the middle of reading the Pretty Little Liars series ... and I'm pretty addicted to it!

My First Giveaway!

I've always been kind of interested in how all of these blogs get to give away these fabulous gift certificates and prizes and what not ... and now I'm lucky enough to get to offer one to you guys myself!  I was contacted by CSN Stores who sells anything you could ever possibly need, like wall art and decor, bed & bath decor, kitchen necessities, and even cute kid stuff, and they're offering you guys an awesome gift certificate!

Saige would totally LOVE this!

And I myself would love one of these!  Now that I'm looking at it again, I may actually have to order one haha...

Just two examples of the awesome stuff you can find on there, and for great prices!  

So now to the giveaway details.  CSN is giving a lucky reader a $15 gift certificate to their online stores!  You have a few different chances to win.  

1) follow my blog!  if you already do, then comment telling me so

2) tweet this giveaway with the link to this post.  comment with the link telling me you did so

3)blog about this giveaway and link me to your post.  again comment so I know.  

4) tell me about the things you would buy if you were the lucky winner of this giveaway!  

Ok guys thats 4 different ways to win!  In a week I will randomly choose a winner and post here.  If you don't check this often, make sure I have an email address to contact you at.  Good luck!!

i've been a bad blogger...

I've just seemed so uninspired to write lately.  No particular reason why.  I've opened this tons of times to write, and end up just closing it.  Oh well, forgive me :)

This week has been pretty eventful....well, past two weeks I guess it would be.  Last week we got a foot of snow, so that was fun.  This week we got a crazy ice storm on top of all of that snow.  I'm not sure which I'd prefer, a foot of snow, or ice.  Tough call.  I heard today that we may be expecting another huge storm this week, about thursday, that could bring us over a foot more snow.  Come on spring!

Also this week, my friend Erin had her beautiful baby Fiona!  I can't wait to meet her!  I've been experiencing baby fever lately hah.  All these cute little babies really makes me want another one, but I'm pretty sure thats just not in the cards for me haha.  Oh well, I'm content with my little Saige.  :)

This weekend seems busy, but not really.  Sunday is a surprise baby shower for a co-worker.  I'm supposed to help set that up tomorrow night.  Her family went to start setting up tonight, so I'm not sure if they will even need me.  I guess I'll figure that out tomorrow.  I guess i'm not really as busy as I thought I was this weekend hah.  We're supposed to play a game at hinkle's saturday night, but not sure thats going to happen now with the gross weather that is heading our way tonight into tomorrow.  Saige is going to her grandparents at some point tomorrow, not quite sure when yet.  I'd like to see Trish at some point, hopefully we can make that happen!

Well, I'm sure I'm forgetting something somewhere, but I'm getting too warm and too sleepy in my bed to keep writing and promise it will make sense haha.  Off to watch csi reruns & slip into dreamland :)

mr. sandman...bring me a dream...

Lately my sleeping has been WAY out of whack.  I may not have had the best sleep pattern before, but it was always predictable.  Now it's just all over the place.  Before I would fall asleep around midnight.  I would sleep propped up in 2 big pillows and sleep in sweats, a t-shirt, and socks.  Lately I'm alsleep anywhere between 9 pm and 2 am.  Crazy right?  And it's not like i go to bed early on days i'm extra tired.  It could be a day where I haven't really done much of anything, and I can't keep my eyes open past 9.  Also, I can't sleep in my warm comfy clothes anymore.  I'm almost always in shorts and no socks.  now, anyone who knows me knows i HATE being bare footed, so this alone is enough to kind of bother me.  Also I have to sleep on one flat pillow now instead of my giant pile .. i'm finding that when i sleep with two I wake up totally achy in my neck and back.  I've also been told i'm snoring a lot more lately.  Now, that I think I can attribute to my downward spiraling sinus problems, but everything else I'm so confused.  I mean, these obviously aren't huge problems.  i'm still sleeping at night at some point, it's just unusual.  Anyone have any tips/opinions?  I read at night in bed which makes me relaxed and fall asleep pretty easily.  i'm just more concerned as to why my body did this weird temperature/comfortableness flip flop out of nowhere.  Oh the things the body and mind do sometimes...

organization

In an attempt to organize my life, I made myself a chart.  I'm one of those "visual" people who really needs to be able to SEE something to get me to do it.  Otherwise I find myself ignoring what needs to be done and scraping by with the bare minimum .. resulting in me being unhappy with my room and other areas of the house.  I decided to list the task that needed to be done, the date that I should have it completed by, and then a blank to fill in the date of the day it was actually completed.  That way I have to be responsible for what I've done or haven't done.  I'll hate having to write in a date that admits I failed, haha, so hopefully this will keep me motivated.  This whole thing may seem ridiculous to some, but, whatever works right?  What do you guys do to get, and stay organized?

a lot about nothing...

As I write this blog (which has no particular direction it's going in, so I apologize ahead of time for the rambling) it's snowing again.  I've lived in Pennsylvania my entire life, and I remember getting a decent amount of snow when I was a little girl, but in recent years not a whole lot.  This past year?  RIDICULOUS!  I think it's beautiful, but i'm so sick of driving in it!  Tonight is 1-4 inches and then turning to sleet/freezing rain.  Saige already has a 2 hour delay for school tomorrow.  Driving into work at 7 am should be fantastic.  ugh!  Ok, I'm done throwing my temper tantrum now, but enough is enough sheesh.

Anyway ... I should probably update, but I don't really have much to update about.  My weekend was the same as usual.  I had Saige all weekend so I didn't do a whole lot.  Went to the fox like I usually end up doing on Saturday nights.  Ate, hung out, and watched football.  Sunday I grocery shopped in the morning and then did laundry and watched football.  Are we seeing a pattern with my weekend?  haha.  Oh yeah, Friday was my mom's birthday.  I also ended up with bronchitis friday so I stayed home from work and went to the doctors, but later that night myself, Saige, my sister, hinkle, and my mom all went to Maggianos for her birthday dinner.  She had never been, so we took her there.  The food was delicious as always.  After that we all just sat around the house til like 12;30 hanging out and talking.  I just realized I reviewed my weekend from sunday-friday instead of friday-sunday.  interesting, ha.  I blame my nighttime cough syrup :)

I don't think I've got much more to talk about here really.  I should probably go to bed now because I have a feeling tonight may be a long night.  Saige is coughing a lot and that always means no sleep for me! the work of a parent is never done I suppose...goodnight everyone.

dreaming...

This post was inspired by Life as a Jane Doe and her fantastic post about what kind of things she wants to buy for spring! :)

As I looked at all of her really cute things she posted, it got me day dreaming and picturing myself wearing clothes like that.  I can't really wear that stuff now because of my weight.  Well, I mean I could, but it wouldn't be as flattering as if I were less lumpy :)  So, I got more excited and motivated to lose this weight before it gets warm out so I can buy cute stuff this year!  I started looking around online and found some cute stuff that I'm excited to be able to buy (and fit in to) for the upcoming spring season.  Now I just need to lose this weight! :)

Charlotte Russe Bouquet Crochet Back Top

Charlotte Russe Feelin Fancy Lace Top

Charlotte Russe Deep Cowl Neck Top

Abercrombie Natalie Dress

AND! i want to look better in this swim suit!

thats all....thanks for hanging around for my dreaming haha

to do list for the year...starting today

Now, these aren't resolutions.  These are things that I need to do, and WILL do, hopefully sooner than later this year.  If I write them down for all to see, then maybe I'll feel a bit more accountable for them haha.  We'll see.

• GET THIS ROOM CLEAN! and keep it clean!  - I'm such a slob when it comes to my bedroom.  Seriously, you'd think i'm like 15 again or something.  I just never feel motivated to do it.  I start it and then never finish, and then it just gets worse.
• DE-CLUTTER!  this goes with cleaning the room.  stop holding on to stuff I'm never going to use.  This room isn't that big, gotta get rid of the stuff I don't need/use.
• exercise, exercise, exercise - we've been over this, no need to beat a dead horse with a stick
• less computer time, more reading time - also been over this
• less facebook updating.  that sounds stupid, but the other day i went back to the beginning of my facebook (nov 2004 haha) and it took FOREVER, because I update about stupid stuff all the time.  
• come out of my comfort zone.  i started this one already.  Last night I called some old woman about a house for Hinkle.  I used to be terrified of ordering food on the phone so thats huge for me hahhaa.  
• use sunday's to get things done.  Sure, if I don't have Saige I'm going to sleep in, BUT after i wake up I need to get going and get stuff done (I type this as i lay in bed on a sunday at 11 am ..see what I mean? haha)
• make more of an effort to talk to more friends more often.  I talked to like, 3 people on a "regular" basis.  I need to get out there and make more of an effort. 
• keep my car clean!  gosh that thing is a mess.  no matter how hard I try, I destroy it hahaha.  

I'm sure I'm forgetting something, but thats good enough for now.  now it's time to get out of bed and actually do something haha.

day 2...

another day of eating right and exercising under my belt!  i still feel so full with eating all of this food, but i'm doing it haha.  I also decided how i'm going to work on my running.  I'm only running a mile right now.  That doesn't seem like a lot, i know, but hear me out.  I'm running a mile until i get it down to 10 minutes a mile. then i'll start to increase my distance.  i figure if i do that, then i'll be giving my body time to get used to the idea of running and adapting to it, making me more likely to develop back into positive running habits?  who knows, it could be an awful idea, but i'm giving it a shot.  what do you think?

otherwise not much is new really.  my bedroom is being attacked by stink bugs tonight for some reason.  don't they know it's like 30 degrees outside?  geez, go away already, it's january!  work was actually ok today.  i had pretty good help today and that always makes a huge difference.  we'll see how tomorrow goes, i'm sure it will go back to sucking.  it was nice while it lasted.

i'm going to start reading a book tonight.  i go in these spurts where i read all the time, and then i stop.  i want to get in the habit of reading for at least a half an hour each night.  i think i spend entirely too much time on the computer and watching tv.  reading always relaxes me as well, and i've been having some serious trouble falling asleep at night (which lead me to waking up late today, lame) so i'm hoping that reading more will result in me falling asleep easier.  i usually fall asleep with a book in my hand when i read haha, so keep your fingers crossed that it works!

hope everyone's having a great start to their new year!

day one..

I actually ran today!  granted I only did a mile, but i figured if i started out slowly then i'd gradually increase and maybe stick with it better?  who knows.  all i know is i ran a mile.  and my legs are killing me.  and i've never felt so out of shape.  but, i'm going to keep going!  i think i can, i think i can haha.  anyway, yeah so i forgot just how MUCH food you have to eat when you're eating healthy.  im' using my sparkpeople app today to track all of the food i'm eating, and i'm having a snack now because i'm still not up to all the levels i should be at for the day.  i'm not a huge eater so i feel like i might explode.  it's funny how making poor food choices just sets you back so much.  if i would have just kept eating the amount of food that i usually eat, but eat good thing then i wouldn't be in this predicament to begin with.  oh well.  that being said i ate well today and resisted snacking even though my day at work sucked, so i was impressed with myself.  i already made/packed my food for the day tomorrow adn pulled out ground beef for dinner, and i'm planning to get another run in tomorrow, so i'm getting there.  slowly but surely i'm getting there.

back on the horse...

so for the millionth time i'm getting back on the horse with the losing weight mission.  maybe if i make a list of things that i need TO do and things i need to NOT do then i'll have a reminder and stick to it?  i don't know, all i know is that i no longer fit very well in the snow pants i bought in the beginning of the year.  thats awful, time to fix that nonsense! i'm not buying new freggin snowpants! haha.  anyway here we go...

Things I need TO do:

• pack my lunch every day.  that involves actually having to think about my meal and measuring out my food.  i've never really officially measured by serving or whatever, i always just kind of eyeballed it.  maybe this will work better.
• go to the gym every day after work.  there's really no excuse why i can't do that.  i work AT the gym for pete's sake.  If i know i can't get there after work then i need to go on my lunch break.  5 days a week, no excuses.  i'll let the weekend be my "rest" time .. unless i'm feeling especially motivated haha.
• get better sleep.  i don't know why i expect to stay up til 1 am and then feel normal and energetic when i wake up at 5:45.  maybe if i get more sleep at night i'll be more ready to go work out.  
• do more cooking. fast food has become way too common around here ... which attributes to the fat around my waistline that's become way too common as well.  it's not great for saige either, so i need to stop.
• along with cooking comes meal planning.  start planning dinner the night before so it's thawed out and ready to go when i get home from work.    
• use the sparkpeople app on my new itouch (thanks hinkle!) to keep track of what i eat.  also use it for working out when i run (nike+ app).
• don't get discouraged.  it's hard to not be bummed out when not seeing immediate progress.  i think that was one of my big problems before, i was always bummed that it took so long and that i wasn't seeing a change.  the scale said i was changing, but i couldn't SEE it.  i need to be patient with myself and know that change will come if i stick to it, and it will be worth it, i just have to give it time.

Things I need to NOT do:

• don't hot out on snacks.  at work i get so stressed out that i eat everything in sight.  so, until i can find a way to deal with my stress another way (or find a new job) then i need to stop snacking and stick to what i bring with me and only that.
• don't order out all the time.  that crap is terrible for me.  and it's making me look like a weeble.
• don't eat the same stuff every day.  switch it up, so i stand a better chance of not getting bored and not sticking with eating healthy.  
• stop dressing like a teenager.  and i don't mean in a skanky way ..i mean a lazy college teenager.  i've found it easy to hide my fatness behind lots of big baggy hoodies.  no wonder i can't find a man!  maybe if i start dressing a little nicer then i'll be able to see a change more and i'll get some confidence back.  spiraling effect?  lets hope so, cause andrea would love to find a man and get married before she's 40! haha
• and last but certainly not least...DON'T MAKE EXCUSES!  do what you need to do!  (i'm talking to myself here, ha).  you know what needs to be done, so just do it and stop the complaining!  

wish me luck!!!!