I had my first run in with "bullying" today with Saige. She wasn't the bullier or the one being bullied, but she was a bystander who did nothing. With all of the crazy suicides and things happening with bullying lately that you see on the news, this was kind of a big deal for me.
When we were driving home tonight she said that a girl threatened to beat her up. I immediately was concerned, obviously. I asked why and she said that the little girl who threatened her was being picked on by another girl (who i personally know from working at the daycare and don't particularly care for this little girl to begin with) and that the girl who was being picked on thought saige was involved and retaliated by threatening her. Oh course saige swears she wasn't involved, and said that i can ask her teacher tomorrow (which i'm going to do, and she knows darn right well i'm going to so i'm sure she's not lying ...usually when i use that threat she fesses up the truth ha). I explained to her though that by standing there and not helping the little girl who was getting picked on (not by directly involving herself physically, but even by just telling a teacher) that she in turn was hurting the little girl as well. i also explained to her that if i find out she's ever involved in picking on a child that she'll have severe consequences that she's never even experienced yet in life. This is a situation that i will not tolerate now, or ever.
I'm always concerned that Saige is going to get picked on, especially now that she has her glasses, because I'm her mother and all mothers worry about that kind of stuff i'm sure. However, a thought crossed my mind when i was dealing with all of this tonight. Why do we never worry that are kids are going to be the BULLY instead of worrying that they're going to be picked on? After today, I now kind of question this myself, but i hope that I handled the situation well enough that she won't turn into that kind of mean girl we all dreaded in school. Saige is a sweet girl and generally enjoys helping her friends so I'm sure she'll be a good girl (i'm her mom, i'm allowed to think positively haha). Why is this an issue in kindergarten?! When did kids get so mean? Why do we allow are kids to act this way? I don't believe that kids are naturally mean spirited, it's obviously learned behavior. Is it tv? bad parenting? lack of rules? what causes this? All i know is that it is an issue I will be consistently re-visiting with her to continue to instill in her the proper ways to treat someone, because i'll be darned if i'm going to raise a bully, or an enabler for that matter. I'll be speaking to her teachers tomorrow, and hopefully together this can be handled properly. While saige wasn't directly involved in the situation, I feel that it's an issue that needs to be addressed to the entire student class. perhaps i'm over-reacting, but this kind of stuff just cannot go on, especially when they're 5 years old. what a crazy world we live in.
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